2023-10-25

🎥SEC Sued: Coinbase Fights Back!

October 25, 2023

Good morning, beautiful people,Keep your hats on folks...it's way too early to start planning extravagant purchases!

Ok, so, we are thinking sensible thoughts, let's dive in.

🥊 Coinbase vs. SEC: Final Round
🌪️ Crypto and Chaos Collide
👋 BlockFi Bids Goodbye

🏦 Coinbase Stands Its Ground: SEC’s Tightrope Walk

In a high-stakes brawl, 🤼 Coinbase has thrown down the proverbial gauntlet, challenging the SEC's mighty grip on its listed cryptocurrencies.

Picture this: a David and Goliath battle, 🐦🆚🐘 but this time, David is armed with legal briefs, and he’s not backing down.I'm not sure if David ever backed down...but there we go!

Yesterday, in the arena of a New York District Court, Coinbase delivered a verbal sucker punch, 🥊 declaring the SEC’s definition of a security as wide as the Grand Canyon 🏞 and as murky as a foggy day in San Francisco.They argued that the SEC is trying to grab everything in sight when, in reality, they should only have their hands on securities transactions.Boom, one-two punch!

Coinbase’s legal jab is a counter-move to the SEC’s October 3rd rebuttal, where they played their hand, insisting that various cryptocurrencies listed on Coinbase were investment contracts.

Now, the ball is in Judge Katherine Polk Failla’s court. 🏀Will she call for a courtroom rematch, dismiss the case, or hand it over to a jury? The legal battle continues, and all eyes are on her next move. 🏛👀🕊

🤯 Elizabeth Warren’s Crypto Crusade: The Hamas Hyperbole

In the latest episode of “Politicians vs. Crypto,” Senator Elizabeth Warren takes center stage, armed with a narrative that casts crypto as the villainous underbelly of terrorist financing. 🦹‍♀️

The plot? A war on crypto, fueled by sensationalist media and claims larger than life. 📰💣

The drama unfolded on October 10th when Israeli police froze crypto accounts linked to Hamas.Despite the small sums involved – with one account holding a mere $16 – Warren seized the moment to rally over 100 U.S. lawmakers, sending a call-to-arms letter to the Biden administration. 💌🏛Their mission? Crack down on crypto, with an urgency reminiscent of a superhero movie countdown. 🕰🚀

Haven't we seen this FUD before?While Warren’s letter paints a picture of crypto as the mastermind of financial chaos, the U.S. Treasury’s October 18th sanctions reveal a less dramatic reality: a $2,000 Bitcoin transaction and pocket-change wallets. 💸🔍

Former CIA analyst Yaya Fanusie plays the voice of reason, reminding us that terrorists are resourceful, weaving through financial channels with a nimbleness that outpaces the crypto narrative. 🎭🐾

So as the curtain falls on this episode of political theatre, we’re left to ponder: is Warren’s war on crypto a well-intentioned battle against the forces of evil, or a sensationalist saga that misses the mark?Given her prior statements and the fact it's election year soon...I think we all have an idea...right? ⌛🤷‍♀️🎬

📉 BlockFi's Bittersweet Farewell: Post-Bankruptcy Plans

Jersey City’s crypto lender, BlockFi, resurfaced from bankruptcy’s abyss on Tuesday, heralding the start of its wind-down waltz. 🕊️💔

Eleven months post-FTX’s dramatic demise, BlockFi’s begun the bittersweet ballet of returning crypto assets to its clientele.Some light at the end of a very long tunnel!Yet turbulence in the crypto cosmos continues, as BlockFi keeps its legal lances aimed at fellow bankrupted brethren, including FTX and Three Arrows Capital. 🤺🏦

Customers with interest-earning ‘Earn’ accounts hold their breath, as recovery roulette spins, estimating returns between 39.4% and a hopeful 100%. 🤞💰BlockFi’s November 2022 bankruptcy bow spotlighted loans to Alameda, FTX’s sibling in sorrow, as a collapse catalyst. 📉🔗Sam and Caroline strike again!

BlockFi breaks the news: Wallet customers, you’re up first for withdrawals.Interest Account holders and Retail Loan borrowers, your repayment reprise awaits, albeit with amounts pending the FTX bankruptcy’s final bow. 🎭💸